I personally had to adapt to a new reality even though it was my daughter who had the illness. I had to adjust my expectations and plans so I could handle the crises which were now a part of our lives. It is difficult to resign yourself to the fact that your child may not finish her education, get a job or have relationships like her friends. Our hopes and dreams for our children are years in the making and when they are dashed because of something beyond our control, it is easy for anger and resentment to make you miserable. Until I adjusted my thinking and changed my expectations, I was miserable. I had to closely examine my life and become more accepting that I could not control some things. It is important to note that mental illness not only affects the person with the illness, but also the rest of the family.